Here I sit April 3, 2010 just five days from my second stroke. There is so much that I want to say that I may need to break it down into

separate topics. First let me say that like the first stroke this one took me totally by surprise.

Looking back, I can totally understand why the first one happened though. I had hypertension that I totally ignored, I packed on about

30 extra pounds plus I was haphazardly attempting to operate three businesses. I believe there are quite a few quotes relating

to the jack of all trades and master of none. Ever get stuck in either deep snow or sand? the faster you spin your wheels the deeper

you descend and the more you get stuck.

But I changed my life after that paralyzing encounter that brought me uncomfortably close to sending me to the promised land.

I never thought anything like that would ever happen to me. Isn't that what everyone who has a major life changing event says?

Things do happen though and I accepted it as my cross to bear. It was a one time thing which I had no choice but to adapt.

What a confusing time. The uncertainty, will I ever walk again?

Will I return to work? Will I ever be able to use my left hand? Will my shoulder go back in place? Will my face look normal?

Shall I ever be able to think and speak coherently? Will I make love ever again? Will I even live? Overwhelming questions with few

answers and no one to ask or anywhere to turn. Strokes Suck.

My passion and new found purpose then was to become the very best that I could possibly be.

To become my best self and to help others through my website Strokes Suck.

I did just that while creating a great exercise/rehab tool to help me in my recovery, pushing myself harder than ever in my life

 I gained strength and grew stronger daily never giving up. I read and continue to read positive inspirational books.

I listened to tapes and attended seminars and webinars always with the purpose of bettering my life. My diet changed. I began to

meditate. I learned to relax and breathe properly. I studied yoga.

 I was finding the answers and became passionate to share what I learned with others.

This past summer was spent in part writing a yet to be published book appropriately titled "Strokes Suck...But"

Recently I created an interactive version of my site of Facebook with the same name that is truly helping many including myself.

The membership list grows daily. God helped me to free a young survivor and mother of two toddlers from the bottom of the abyss.

She understood the power of removing the focus of misery from herself and to partner with God to empower others.

Jesus wasn't kidding when he said to simply give Love. I don't know why we have such a difficult time understanding this concept.

Four other young women survivors joined ranks with the same philosophy. We began to help even more.

Our numbers began to swell. Our philosophy is to Give, Help and Inspire with Kindness and Love.


An angel with a broken wing appeared from across the pond. She desired to fly once again. God helped me to assist her on her

 own Climb from the abyss. She needed a Push and is now remembering how to fly. This angel with a mending wing is

operating Strokes Suck in the United Kingdom and has become my best friend.


If only I had  a had these people, some of the answers or even a place to share with others like Strokes Suck during my first year of

recovery. But God has a plan like the changing of the seasons. You can not force fruit to ripen on the tree.

The snow will melt and the flowers will bloom when it is there time. God's universe is in no hurry, can we do better?


So after all that imagine my surprise when my right hand developed that familiar feeling of numbness that accompanied my brain

bleed of three and a half years ago. Why am I talking funny? Could this really be happening again? Only on the other side now?

A delayed April Fools joke perhaps? Sometimes lightning does strike twice. Another brain attack  back for an encore.

Fortunately for me this one was less severe. Knowing what I know and going through what I have, I am more than prepared to

place this genie back in the bottle.

Everything happens for a purpose and I doubt that with my "pay grade" I will ever fully understand God's plan in my time on earth.

I have some thoughts though as to why I was spared once more.

 I am glad that I believe and trust in God's plan. This promises to be interesting. To be continued.

Bob Miller
Strokes Suck
Strokes Suck on Facebook
Strokes Suck in the UK